Dibs, I Saw Him First

Yesterday I was online when I came across a debate about women calling "first dibs" on men. The consensus seemed to be that if friends meet or see a man, the first one to admire him had full reign of him. Really? I have a very strong opinion about this and it seems to be quite different from the masses.

While reading through the discussion, I realized that women were actually agreeing that men were off limits to a friend if she merely said that the guy was "hot" first. HUH?! *scratches my head* Let me get this straight, so if I see, or speak to a guy and find him attractive, and this same man finds me attractive, we (he & I) cannot talk to one another because my friend said he was attractive before I did? Wooaah Nelly! That is absurd!

Let me explain something to anyone who thinks for one second that this nonsense is ok. In life, you win some and you lose some! It is not up to you to hinder the union of two other people because you are selfish or insecure that they will find love or happiness before you, or because you feel that guy would look better with you, or whatever your reason may be. If this principle was to hold up, how many people would be off limits due to someone else finding them attractive? Think about it this way, if you saw two men at the mall and one walked up to you, but you were totally eyeing his friend, would it be alright for this guy to call dibs on you simply because he approached you first? Heck no! The audacity of some people to EVER think this was acceptable.

I am wondering if I am the only one who has a different view on how life and love goes because after reading the comments, I was shocked. I would never expect a friend of mine to not pursue a man interested in her simply because I think he is cute. What does cute, sexy or attractive have to do with it? If nothing has happened between us, why would I want someone who clearly has no interest in me? Seems extremely self-centered. And if you are in this situation now, I hope that you step back and evaluate your friendship because a true friend would want the best for her girl... that means not cock-blocking (excuse my language).

Please let me know your opinions on this.

Posted in: friendship, love, relationships