Are You a Capable Sexual Partner

I had a request from one of my friends to write a piece about what a man should do to be considered a capable sex partner. Now, this can be very challenging, considering that we are all individuals and what one person may like, another may hate… but just like anything else… there are always some standards that should be met. Ladies, don’t let these men get away with anything less. That’s why some of them are walking around thinking they are handling business, but let me tell you, you aren’t unless you are at least, meeting this criteria:

1. Fourplay- Ok, so some women may think that they are beyond the foreplay; that they can in fact, be ready to go… just like that. However, whether you are mentally or physically stimulated, you need to pre-game before the show. Although physical stimulation is great, it does not take away from the mental. Men, remember that most women are in their head first, if you can make us feel comfortable, you can have us open and ready for business.

2. Attentiveness- So men, it doesn’t matter how “good” you are (well maybe a little, LOL), if you aren’t into us! You can easily break our connection with you if you are not attentive and that will ultimately make the whole act, worthless. The things you need to do are: look in our eyes, talk to us, and let us know that it all about us at that particular moment. We want to feel like no one else exists in your world (although some of you probably have multiple women on the side). But it doesn’t matter if you know how to make her feel… it’s like, “you are mine and me… yours!” Now what woman doesn’t want that, even if only for a minute?

3. Workability- Last, but certainly not least, is workability. I mean, come on guys! We know not every man is working with the gold wrapper, BUT you have to know how to do something with your package or at least your pre-game procedures (*ahem* you know what I mean, Mr. Go Down South). Us ladies, we will work with you if we like you, but you got to have the basics (listed in this article) for us to consider. All I am saying is, if you slack in one area, step it up in another! That seems simple enough, but can you handle it?

Good Luck Men… I should probably be wishing the ladies luck! Either way, have fun… MUAH!

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Drunken Hot Girl

Saturday evening, sitting on the pier in the District of Columbia with the wind blowing through your hair, light sprinkle from the waterfront misting your cheeks, and subtle sounds of city cars in the background, can sometimes have an arousing effect on a single woman with an open mind… take that woman and multiply her by 3 and you have a full fledge conversation with no limitations. Much like Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte of Sex in the City, we too have our tales, but what about the rest of you? I know we all have something to tell. So what if we talk about the infamous sex after dark. You know what encounter I am referring to… the one that happen after 3 drinks and a cab ride home. So I ask, is sex better while under the influence of alcohol?

After my girls and I had our conversation, I came to realize that more of us practice this than we care to admit. You walk out of the club feeling free and liberated. The only thought on your mind, “I’m going to work him out!” But is it really that the sex is that good after consumption of vodka martinis and shots of Patron OR is it the fact that we have no inhibitions? While intoxicated, you let it all hang out (literally), you do all the things that you would normally be too afraid to even attempt. So, are we hiding behind drunken excuses as a way to share our inner freak? Hmmmm… I wanted to back my suspicions with some statistics and this is what I found: Did you know that 1 out of 20 women between the ages of 18 and 50 have NEVER had sex sober? Wow! That’s almost scary. I believe that these women are either afraid to be themselves, or they have practiced sex like this for so long that it is the only way they know how to do it. What do you do when you know no other way?

While drunken sex can be fun, daring and exciting, sober sex is real, intimate and worth the uncomfortable beginnings. My advice to anyone that may fall into this category would be to try sober sex. It can be daunting at first, especially if you have never had the pleasure to experience it in a sober state of mind, but it will allow you to release your insecurities and embrace your body and ability. You will come to a place that permits you to be free and confident in yourself and that alone, is worth the try. Good Luck!

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