AskHeatherG
Ladies and that damn “List.” Now, how unrealistic is this? Let me ask you a question, do you think you can write a checklist of all the things you want in a man, and actually get it… in one man? I highly doubt it. Ladies, we have to be a bit more realistic. Put down your pen and paper and take mental note… you canNOT prescribe a perfect man! Besides, who would really want a man that abided by your every beckon call? Seriously, I mean, isn’t that half the joy of having a man… his mystique?
Women, we have our ideals, and I am not saying that you should not have standards, but it is not rational to expect a man to drink wine, watch love stories and massage your feet every night, while whispering sweet nothings in your ear. 9 times out of 10, you’re just not going to get it. No offense, but who would really want it, some control freak?! That’s another whole issue that I am not going to touch on. But seriously, take a look at your criteria. Is it obtainable? And if it is, do you REALLY want that? How many times have we heard about the girl whose man does it all, gives her what she want, and looks good doing it, but homegirl doesn’t want him? It is not coincidence, it is her lack of interest… he is too predictable and she is getting bored. Can you blame her? “I want a man that will tell me ‘no’ dammit!” Well sometimes… LOL.
My advice ladies, work with what you have and if you don’t possess him yet, toss the list! Simple.
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You hit on some very interesting points within this post...my thoughts on that it is so true in a lot of ways...also the tightest part about the blog is how you should always keep a mystery to a relationship..if you give a man or a woman all they want too quick then you will get bored easily and want something new...so speaking from a mans point of view...all that mushy stuff is cool every now and then but damnit like I ALWAYS SAY...MAN HAVE 3 BASIC NEEDS...FOOD...STROKING OF THE EGO...AND SEX...ALL THAT SHOUTS LOVE TO US...GOOD POST THOUGH
I don't think having a list is unrealistic. It should provide a base for at least the minimum you might expect from a partner. I think the key is making the list fluid and also not expecting anything from a man that you also aren't able to offer yourself. For example, I expect a man to be funny, Christian, attractive, intelligent, family oriented, hard working and driven, with his own sense of style/fashion and INTO ME. I don't think these things are too much to ask for. I'm not pressed on height, skin color, education, or any other superficial qualities.
I think it's ok to have a list. You may not get all of it in one person but then you might. Your list helps you to understand the basic foundational things you "would like" in a mate. As I told someone in a recent conversation, "hint hint", everybody has baggage. You just have to accept which junk YOU want to deal with.
Maybe you can create a list of the things that you must absolutely "HAVE" in a mate NO EXCEPTIONS! Then you can write those things down you desire beyond the call of duty in your mate. To add a little humor,lol...It's almost like making a good hamburger. You want the meat because it wouldn't be a hamburger without the meat. But you wouldn't necessarily have to have: pickles, onions, ketchup, lettuce, tomatoes, "the fixins". You may desire that, but your basic essential is the meat.
With that said, lay out your foundations on what you actually NEED from your mate and then write down the "Fixins" lol. Either way you look at it you still have your meat! LOL
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